I opted for 1 (Target brand) Tylenol PM before my shower to make myself go to sleep. Recommended dose is 2 pills but I didn’t want to be dead to the world. Addy got put to bed (read: Pack N Play) about 1030.

315am – addy starts to squirm so I wake Brownlee up and go make a bottle. He feeds her but I’m awake the whole time. She’s still hungry so I make another bottle. We’re all back to sleep about 345

530am – alarm goes off. Snooze.
539am – alarm goes off. Snooze.
548am – alarm goes off. Brownlee tells me to go to work.

630 – I’m out the door on top. Shocked.
654-pull up at office. Still amazed that I’m on time and hoping my boss doesn’t get the wrong impression that this will be normal. Dock computer to my workstation and wait for everything to update.

704 – make a delicious cup of tea. I’ve basically been off caffeine (save for the occassional Chai Latte or Mocha Frappe) for 8 weeks. Feels good.
705 – First dumb question of the day “did you decide on a name”. Kid’s 8 weeks old guy. We named her.
708 – the guys simultaneously love that I am back and hate me for being gone so long causing mass confusion within the bunch. I promise them to work on clarity if I ever get into the system. Glad to know they miss me *coughjobsecuritycough*
738 – finally get logged into system and start with important tasks like changing desktop to and Addy picture and ripping Adele’s 21 to hard drive
745-805 – ladies come over to look at pics (whipped out Brag Book) and catch me up on workplace gossip. Nothings changed.
808 – weed through unnecessary emails. Accept invite to Ice Cream Social. Go to coworkers desk for donuts. Nothings changed.

9am – feeling some kind of way about not feeling some kind of way about being away from Addy. She’s at home with Brownlee so I’m not worried. Plus we’re usually sleep at this time so I don’t think I’m missing anything…besides sleep. Starting to think tea and donut were too much too soon and I shoulda eased into the caffeine and sugar. Starting to crash. Barely remember where anything on the network is and there’s too many new people around here (like 3).

1140 – can’t believe how fast its going! Even though I’ve gotten nothing accomplished. Now to lunch!!!!! For the past couple months this is about when I’m eating breakfast. Its crazy to feel all this freedom about what will I eat for lunch but for some reason I do and sorta feel bad about it. Usually we just pick whatever is in the house or if one of us would go to get food then we’d go out and come right back and then we’d eat really quickly if Addy was asleep or if she was up then we’d alternate watching her and eating. I also consider just having a quick 30 minute lunch and asking John if I can leave at 330. I probably shoulda eased back into this all day thing.

1155 – stop to get gas and see what people have been complaining about the past few months. I haven’t filled up my gas tank since late March and was at 3/10 of a tank. How is $20 of gas 5 gallons?! Glad I stopped before I went to get lunch. Value menu it is.

1p – go to have a pow-wow with John about what’s going on. Me: “I don’t know what’s going on around here” CoWorker “none of us do”. Nothings changed. Apparently I’m supposed to do my mid-year review this week and we’re supposed to see where I am on my goals for the year. Had baby. Check. Bonus points for not going into labor at work.

205 – several more coworkers have stopped by to see how I’m doing and welcome me back. They keep asking if I miss the baby. Sure but I mean what was I gonna do? Never work again? And I’m doing fine and they’re all “just wait”. Should I be in tears? there’s some ancient “just wait” proverb that I get the jist of but can’t fully remember. Consider taking time to google it…either way they don’t know my stance on enjoying now but I just smile and nod like I did about pregnancy comments.

230 – got that “330 feeling” an hour early. Tea time.

330 – commence shutdown sequence!!!! Not dead tired. Day One a success.